Aoba47

Thank you today for Kes (Star Trek), "about a fictional character played by Jennifer Lien from the sci-fi series Star Trek: Voyager. She is a member of the Ocampa, a telepathic alien species who have latent psychic abilities and a life span of only nine years. Featured in the show's first three seasons, Kes is primarily shown either handling her boyfriend Neelix's jealousy or helping the artificial intelligence known as the Doctor develop his humanity. The character was removed in the fourth season after Lien's unspecified personal issues affected her reliability on set."! -- Gerda Arendt (talk) 06:50, 18 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

Thank you! Aoba47 (talk) 12:36, 19 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

Hi there. How are you doing? Heavenly Delusion still hasn't been copyedited by the guild so I instead had Lelouch Lamperouge turned into a GA which was kinda tiring due to his popularity and large appearances. I currently have no other goals besides Heavenly Delusion, but I just realized an old article I created, Akito Hyuga, has potential to become a GA as there is both creation and reception sections cited. The only thing lacking is a copyedit to see if it can become another GA. It's a really small Code Geass article when compared to Lelouch so I wanted to know if you could give it a look and revise the prose. Anyways, happy editing. If anything, ask me for a favor like reviewing something. Cheers.Tintor2 (talk) 00:24, 24 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

@Tintor2: Thank you for the message. I am doing well. Just trying my best to be honest. I am in the middle of reviewing two FACs and a peer review at the moment, but when I am done with both, I will look through the Akito Hyuga article. What does stand out to me right away though is the Japanese citations will need to have English translations for their titles. I hope you are doing well and having a great start to your weekend. Aoba47 (talk) 01:25, 24 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

No problem. I did what you advised me. Tintor2 (talk) 23:44, 24 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

About Tidus. This is a really old FA I made in the past so after talking with the user working on Ada Wong about FA demands, I decided to follow the advices he got to rearrange Tidus' reception too. I'm trying to do the same with the GA Kyo Kusanagi too as it is also really old and thus removed most minor references.Tintor2 (talk) 17:01, 25 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

@Tintor2: Thank you for the message. I do want to note that the prose for the "Analysis as a heroic figure" subsection could use work. I would not consider it on the level expected for a FA. I would avoid listing universities as ways to describe the researchers. It does not really help readers better understand who these people are and professors do work for different places over time. There are grammatical errors, like Kristofer F. Sjølie University of Oslo claims, a few spots where the university is directly attributed as saying something, i.e. University of Newfoundland said that and as said by Washington State University. That is just not true as neither of these universities are officially saying either thing. This subsection in particular would need more work. Aoba47 (talk) 22:44, 25 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

Thanks for the advice. I'll try removing those parts. Tintor2 (talk) 23:56, 25 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

I did a brief copy-edit to the lead for the Akito Hyuga article (here), and here are some comments that I had for it:

• The lead uses a lot of in-game terminology that would not make sense to an unfamiliar reader. For instance, what is the E.U. in the context of this game? What is a.t.b. or a "Knightmare Frame pilot"?
• I removed the following from the lead, from Area 11 called W-0, as it was another part that does not really make sense to an unfamiliar reader. I think it may also be unnecessary details for the lead anyway, but feel free to disagree and revert this part back.
• I have know absolutely nothing about the source material so I honestly do not understand what this sentence is saying: Akito is cursed with a supernatural "Geass" after command by his brother Shin Hyuga Shaing that he controls at will, allowing him to savagely kill his enemies in the battlefield, thus was given the title "Hannibal's Ghost" (ハンニバルの亡霊).

I do not think the article is ready for a GAN. The prose for the lead is rough, and I would say the same for the article itself based on my brief look through it. Copy-editing has never been my focus on Wikipedia and as I worked through the lead, I was more and more uncertain if I was the right fit for this. I am just not fully comfortable making changes, particularly to a franchise that I honestly know nothing about (and as I said above, the article does not give enough context or information for unfamiliar readers like me). I think it would be best to work with an editor with more experience in copy-editing. Apologies for not being much help. I just do not want to mess up anything. Apologies again. I hope you are doing well and having a good end to your weekend. Aoba47 (talk) 23:27, 25 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

No problem. Just the advice is enough. Tintor2 (talk) 00:04, 26 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

Thank you for understanding. Aoba47 (talk) 00:50, 26 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

Thanks for the copyedit. If you find anything complicated to understand feel free to tag it. This week I tried revisiting his in-universe info to make it easier to understand. Tintor2 (talk) 23:26, 29 August 2024 (UTC)Reply