Talk:Ulegyria
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For Dr. Burdo's Introductory to Neuroscience class, we will be updating this page to include more detailed information and recent research. This is the draft version of our page so please feel free to comment and suggest improvements.
Sarah Lord, Ellen White, Arjun Gajulapalli
Review
[edit]Great job! Just a few small suggestions/questions. If the information is available, I think it'd be beneficial for you to include a sentence explaining if hypoxic-ischemic brain injury is common to cerebral palsy, mental retardation and epilepsy in the introduction. Also, are there any treatment options for this condition? Good work! -Reedich (talk) 19:50, 29 November 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks, a treatment section was added to the end of the article since a few people asked about this and the relationship between hypoxic-ischemic brain injury and cerebral palsy, mental retardation, and epilepsy is discussed in the beginning. Sarah.lord (talk) 19:39, 1 December 2012 (UTC)
Peer Review
[edit]Hi guys. Good work on the article. Overall, I think it is well written and easy to read. The content in the "Causes" section of your article is really good. however, I think that perhaps breaking up the section more will help with the organization of the article. Maybe this section can be broken into partly a development section or just a clinical significance section. One thing which seemed to be missing here is what originally causes this lack of oxygen to develop this cerebral ischemia and resultant ulegyria. With the current layout it is a bit difficult to understand what the prognosis for a patient who suffers from this disorder entails. I think expanding a bit more on the talk about epilepsy will help, because it seems as is that is one of the more common diseases ulegyric patients suffer from, and not just OLE. Overall, though you guys did a good job with the research and writing, keep up the good work. DineshVannan —Preceding undated comment added 02:28, 19 November 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks! We broke up the Causes section into a few sub-sections and bulleted the list. We also added an explanation on what causes hypoxic ischemic episodes as well. Sarah.lord (talk) 19:20, 1 December 2012 (UTC)
Peer Review
[edit]The amount of information gathered and added in this article is great. The variety of pictures was very useful to understand this article, especially for people who do not know much neuroanatomy.
In the Anatomy section, the description of neurons affected by ulegyria should be consistent, instead of “ulegyria-affected” or “”ulegyria affected.” It would help the reader read the information without being distracted with the variations.
In the Causes section, the line “the fetus begins a series of steps to try to restore oxygenated blood flow to life-sustaining organs,” did not seem to flow as well as the rest. It read like the fetus was consciously trying to fix the issue, when it occurs within.
Furthermore, in the Causes section, the fifth sentence of the second paragraph starting with “An immediate effect” was a bit too long and could be separated into two separate sentences. This would make it easier for the reader to understand what is being explained. The same goes for the first sentence of the third paragraph starting with “Depriving the fetal brain.”
In addition, the Causes section can be reorganized so the reader can follow along on how exactly ulegyria is caused. It would be useful to separate the section further, such as the causes (in general) at the time of birth versus causes (as in the mechanism). The Causes section was rather long, so breaking up the section would make it easier for the reader to follow along.
For the Detection section: Source #7, “Epileptic and imaging findings in perinatal hypoxic-ischemic encephalopathy with ulegyria,” seems to have a more specific and detailed criteria section for diagnosing ulegyria by MRI. Perhaps adding more information in the list would make the article more helpful. Numbering the criteria was a great idea because it helps organize the information.
Overall, organizing the structure/layout of this article would allow for more clarity regarding this topic. This is a great draft!Gracek917 (talk) 01:09, 20 November 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks for the suggestions. We reworded the Causes section as well as reorganized it into sub-sections to make it easier to read. More information was added on the specific criteria for diagnosing ulegyria by MRI.Sarah.lord (talk)
Peer Review
[edit]This article is very well written. It effectively explains the anatomy and causes of Ulegryia as well as its relation to other diseases. While those sections were very informative, I do think that there could be a few additions made to this article. While a lot was said about the connections between Ulegryia and other diseases, I think it would be beneficial to add more about Ulegryia itself. By that, I mean it might be good to explain what Ulegryia causes in terms of physical and mental symptoms. Another addition which might be good to consider is adding a section on the possible treatment of Ulegryia. Although there was a section dedicated to the detection of it, I think it would be nice to add a section explaining if treatment is possible. Other than those two additions, I can't think of anything else that would enhance this article. Well done!Bhaktak (talk) 00:16, 16 November 2012 (UTC)
- We clarified what ulegyria is in the introduction and further discussed it by comparing it to another similar condition further down in the article. A treatment section was added to the bottom of the article. Thanks! Sarah.lord (talk) 19:45, 1 December 2012 (UTC)
Peer Review
[edit]You guys did a really great job at fleshing out how cortical scarring comes about via various human diseases. I think your introduction is perfect, both thorough and concise, as well as well-written, and thus very easy to understand. I also applaud your use of pictures--you really did a magnificent job integrating the important information with these visuals. In order to make your "Causes" section flow a little more coherently, I would suggest bulleting (or numbering) to cause and risk factors of perinatal brain injuries (in the first paragraph); this could lay emphasis on the important information, and make this section a little more reader-friendly.
After this paragraph, you should consider breaking the remaining portion into three separate sub-sections (under causes) that address the biochemical/physiological significance of cerebral ischemia, cerebral hemorrhage, and intrauterine infections, respectively.
The second paragraph has a lot of great information about the processes involved in cerebral ischemia, but I think it could use a little tweaking in terms of its structure. You should break this paragraph in two and start a new one after the third sentence ("...and overall functioning will ensue.") Additionally, the sentence "an immediate effect of low levels of glucose and thus ATP, is the inactivation of the Na-K pump, which leads to the uptake of calcium ions, which activate lipases, proteases, and endonucleases which in the end, destroy the cell skeleton" is a little hard to digest. Perhaps you could break it down into two sentences in order to make your point more clearly. An example could be something like this: "An immediate effect of low intracellular glucose is a reduction in the amount of ATP produced by the cell. This effectively inactivates the Na-K pump, leading to the uptake of calcium ions by the cell. Continued influx of Ca2+ serves to constitutively activate downstream effectors, including lipases, proteases, and endonucleases, whose actions eventually destroy the cell skeleton."
The first sentence of the next paragraph ("depriving the fetal brain of glucose for any amount of time...") is similarly a bit of a run-on and might benefit from a few grammatical corrections. Maybe something like this: "Glucose deprivation in the brain for any amount of time has the potential to pose serious consequences, and the amount of time the brain spends under these anoxic conditions is directly related to accumulation of irreversible damage to protein biosynthesis pathways." And the third sentence in this paragraph refers to "non-vulnerable" and "other areas"--perhaps you could elaborate just a little as to what areas specifically are affected. Perhaps you didn't come across any research as to what exact areas of the brain are considered to be "vulnerable," but I think it's something worth trying to look for.
Additionally, you do a really great job at connecting your very thorough explanation of cerebral ischemia back to ulegyria, but the same can't be said for the remaining two diseases. You should consider trying to integrate how ulegyria factors into these diseases (i.e., how are they related? does one bring about the other? etc.)
Overall you guys did a great job with this article! I can tell you definitely did your research and put a lot of time into making a cohesive snapshot of ulegyria in the brain. I hope you find my advice to be helpful, good luck! Lyndsey Brozyna (talk) 10:37, 19 November 2012 (UTC)
- Thank you for your suggestions. We took your suggestion of breaking down the "Causes" section into the three sub-sections and saw it really helped by identifying multiple causes of ulegyria rather than just one main cause. We saw the sentence structure you pointed out and fixed them into being less wordy and redundant. Again thank you for your suggestions. Agajulapalli (talk) 20:13, 1 December 2012 (UTC)
Peer Review
[edit]Overall I enjoyed reading your article because it was well written and easy to understand. I thought the article was broken down into a logical order of sections for diseases and maladies. A general trend I noticed throughout the article was a good use of hyperlinking, which enabled myself to further understand terms I might have not been familiar with. The introduction section was well written and laid the groundwork for what the reader could expect in the upcoming article
I thought the pictures you used helped to further the reader’s understanding. However, I was confused in the first picture exactly which gyri exhibited ulegyria. Maybe you could clarify this for the reader by indicating with a circle or arrow which gyri are “mushroom-shaped”. Or perhaps you could put two sections of brain side by side, comparing a normal specimen to a specimen containing the scarring. I think this would greatly benefit the reader’s comprehension of the topic.
I think your article would greatly benefit from a treatment section. If this section addressed specifically treating the scarred tissue in the sulcus using surgery or dealt with the symptoms of the scarring it would better your article. I know that you stated that “Most of the epilepsy seen in conjunction with ulegyria is classified as medically refractory”, but what about the other epilepsy cases? Can antiepileptic drugs or surgery be used to treat these cases?
I am curious about your use of the title “ Associated Diseases” under the relation to other diseases category. I think your article would benefit from creating a new section titled “Signs and Symptoms” and placing this information there. Most Wikipedia articles that address diseases and disorders have a section like this. A change like this will make finding information easier for the reader.
Aside from these suggestions I thought the article was very interesting. Previous peer reviews addressed some grammatical edits that I don’t feel a need to restate. I think with our advice, this page will turn out great! James.murphy.0530 (talk) 04:28, 20 November 2012 (UTC)
- Thank you for your suggestions. We followed your suggestion about changing the title of the "Associated Diseases" section into "Signs and Symptoms" and saw that it made it clearer. We also added a treatment section to our page as well Agajulapalli (talk) 20:08, 1 December 2012 (UTC)
Peer Editing
[edit]This was a very well written article. It was easy to follow which is great and I think it covers the important basics of the topics. That being said I think the article could be improved by adding more information about ulegyria itself separate from the associated diseases. Talk a little more about what exactly causes ulegyria and the symptoms. In the causes section I think you should reorganize or separate the section into components because it would make it easier to follow. It would also help if you could talk about the treatment and explain it and also talk about the research that lead up to the discovery of the disease or current research around it. Overall I think it was good. Noor9279 (talk) 04:58, 20 November 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks for your help. We added more information specific to ulegyria and what causes it. A treatment section was added as well. The majority of the current research surrounding ulegyria deals with associating certain characteristics in a MRI with ulegyria diagnosis which is discussed in our article. Sarah.lord (talk) 19:53, 1 December 2012 (UTC)
Image Use
[edit]Read the Image Use Policy again. Wikipedia:Image_use_policy#Free_licenses makes it pretty clear why the image was removed. NeuroJoe (talk) 17:36, 30 November 2012 (UTC)